The Leisure Review: World of Leisure

Tuesday 1 July
Mr Barton of Newcastle, late of Manchester, is given a four-month suspended sentence after pleading guilty to the assault of a former team mate. A Local Government Association report laments the nutritional qualities of food available to school pupils while on trips to museums, theme parks and other attractions. The British Museum’s annual report reveals a record six million visitors during 2007-08, a million higher than the previous year and a higher number than Tate Modern, the previous holder of ‘people through the door’ records. British Museum director Neil MacGregor also confirms he has signed a new contract to stay at the Bloomsbury behemoth for another four years. Martin Johnson begins work as manager of the England rugby team. While Cardiff City FC were racking up operating losses of £5m last year, taking the club’s debt total to £35m, their chairman, Peter Ridsdale, took £1m in salary and bonuses.

Wednesday 2 July
Barristers complain to the BBC about a drama showing the profession as underhand, unprincipled and aggressive. Surely not. Author, journalist and architecture enthusiast Simon Jenkins is elected chairman of the National Trust. An LS Lowry pencil drawing is sold for £49,000 at auction in Exeter and Norfolk County Council reveals that it has been using private detectives to track down overdue library books. Andy Murray’s plans for Wimbledon victory fall foul of Rafa Nadal. Sports minister Gerry Sutcliffe suggests that failure to achieve the target of twelve gold medals and 35 medals in total from Beijing could result in a “review” of UK Sport’s funding.

Thursday 3 July
It seems that the Royal Windsor horse show sees fit to keep anyone of the ‘wrong sort’ off the premises, particularly if they’re of a ‘nomadic’ persuasion.. Kylie Minogue receives her OBE from Prince Charles and the news breaks of plans for a theatrical version of ‘Allo ‘Allo. A paper in the British Medical Journal suggests regular cardiac screening for athletes. Not only did Jay-Z go down a storm at Glasto but music retailers reveal a big surge in sales of anyone appearing on the BBC’s coverage of the event. Long-lost scenes cut from Fritz Lang’s Metropolis have been found in a Buenos Aires museum.

Friday 4 July
Roger Draper’s cup overflows as Laura Murray reaches the Wimbledon junior final. Guy Hands, EMI chairman and private equity rich bloke, is to sue the tax experts that advised him to invest loads of money in ropy British films to exploit a loophole in the tax regulations; it seems that as the films sunk, so did his investment. Boris Johnson, mayor of London (sic), announces a design competition for a new Routemaster bus. Bernie Ecclestone, the diminutive funding fairy of Formula One, says that the British grand prix will be held at Donington from 2010, prompting widespread scepticism, condemnation and ennui. Falling visitor numbers have prompted Italian authorities to declare a state of emergency for Pompeii; heritage minister Sandro Bondi condemns the state of visitor facilities at one of the world’s most famous archaeological sites. George Bush and Nicolas Sarkozy will be at the Beijing Olympic opening ceremony. Mike Ashley is lining up buyers for Newcastle FC, according to reports and England’s hosting of the Twenty20 world cup next year seems to be safe.

Saturday 5 July
Laura Robson wins at Wimbledon, prompting hosannas and drinks all round at the LTA. Serena loses out to big sis Venus in the grown-ups’ final. The day after Berlin’s Madame Tussaud’s unveils an effigy of Hitler, a member of the public takes the figure’s head off; closure of the controversial tableau ensues. Almost ten million people watch the last episode in the current series of Doctor Who.

Sunday 6 July
Rafa Nadal foils the plans of tennis’s other Roger to take six Wimbledon championships in a row, winning the final as night falls over West London. Land values in Newquay have reached around £10m an acre on the strength of the continuing surfing boom. The Chartered Management Institute claims that many UK executives are not taking their full holiday entitlement for fear of losing their jobs. Lewis Hamilton pops out of tax exile to win the British grand prix in the rain.

Monday 7 July
An English Heritage report shows that one in five sites on the Register of Historic Battlefields is in the “at risk” category. A report from the Wetland Vision Partnership says that Great Britain needs to expand its wetlands to protect wildlife, prevent floods and store carbon. Simon Sainsbury’s bequest of eighteen masterpieces, including works from Zoffany, Gainsborough, Monet and Freud, go on show at Tate Britain. An audience of 12.7m viewers watched Nadal beat Federer in yesterday’s Wimbledon final. A report from Turespana, the Spanish tourist board, predicts a decline in visits from Britons and the demise of the classic package holiday.

Tuesday 8 July
The BBC’s commercial arm, BBC Worldwide, announces profits of £117.7m on total sales of £916.3m. Redruth in Cornwall is to introduce a curfew for under-sixteens; any fifteen-year-old out after 9pm will be subjected to the attention of Inspector Knacker. Some doctors in the USA have recommended the use of statins for obese eight-year-olds. The Home Secretary is to invoke ‘special powers’ (flight? X-ray vision?) to enable the GB shooting team to train at home for the 2012 Games. The English RFU is to bid to host the 2015 rugby union world cup, possibly in partnership with Wales. The Hampton Court Palace flower show opens today.

Wednesday 9 July
Get in: Mark Cavendish wins a stage of the Tour de France, the first Briton to win a road stage in the race since Barry Hoban in 1975. Suggestions appear in the press that Boris Johnson is planning to pay workers at the Greater London Authority the ‘London living wage’ of £7.40 an hour and urge the hotel industry to follow suit. Architectural superstar Frank Gehry says that the English “don’t get him”. Residents in the Vaucluse area of France are urged not to use the river after a leak from a nuclear power plant. The British Olympic Association delays the hearing regarding Dwain Chambers and his bid for inclusion in the GB Olympic team. Triple jumper Ashia Hansen, now 36, announces her retirement. “I can no longer train through the pain of injury as I used to,” she says. British Swimming announces American Dennis Pursley as national head coach.

Thurday 10 July
Every British athlete going to Beijing will be tested in the most extensive anti-doping campaign ever attempted in the UK. Work on two landmark buildings in Leeds, known as the ‘glass shards’ and designed by Philippe Starck, has been postponed as a result of the difficult property market. A report from Sports Direct, Mike Ashley’s sports goods retailer, warns that profits have halved in this financial year. Ronaldo, Manchester’s very own Portugese pompadour, likens himself to a slave during a TV interview.

Friday 11 July
A first folio of Shakespeare’s complete plays stolen from Durham University in 1998 appears in the USA; the university says that it is delighted that the £15m book has turned up. Holiday companies suggest that the rising cost of living is behind the boom in in-bound holidays among UK residents. Sand polo comes to the beach at Sandbanks in Dorset for the first time. Hooray! Members at Haywards Heath Golf Club in Sussex will have to get used to brown fairways after a fertiliser mix-up kills off huge swathes of the course’s sward. Communities and local government secretary Hazel Blears rules in favour of Glyndebourne’s plans for a wind turbine. One week into the Tour and the first positive test: au revoir Manuel Beltran of the Liquigas team. The Government Office for the North West approves a £25m scheme for a new stadium for St Helens RFLC; it should be ready for 2011.

Saturday 12 July
Dwain Chambers runs ten seconds dead to win the 100m at the GB Olympic trials, raising the stakes in his impending court case. Mark Cavendish wins another stage of the Tour, grabbing glory in the rain and becoming only the second Brit to win two stages in the same year (Barry Hoban, 1973, since you ask).

Sunday 13 July
It seems that Bath is to have its world heritage status investigated by the United Nations in the light of property development, described by some as “akin to a massive Soviet-era housing project”, within the city. Seamus Heaney is to collaborate with Derek Walcott on a new opera for the Globe Theatre in London this autumn. News leaks of government plans to offer free university education to armed forces personnel at the end of their military careers. The Mail on Sunday announces that plans are afoot for Lady Thatcher to be granted a state funeral when she finally shuffles off.

Monday 14 July
High culture news: Australian broadcasters Ten Network have pulled Big Brother off the air mid-series owing to falling viewing figures; the rest of the world holds its breath. Olympic Price Watch: the government’s tax credit scheme, which is no doubt a worthy and admirable endeavour to support and enable the less well-off, has, according to a HM Revenue and Customs report, lost another £1.5bn to fraud and error; this makes £7bn of credits written off since 2003. Material released under the Freedom of Information Act suggests that worries over the costs of Zaha Hadid’s design for the 2012 Olympic aquatics centre were ignored in favour of a focus on exciting design. More Olympic Price Watch at the Farnborough air show where orders are placed for 150 aircraft worth some £12.5bn. The Indian Premier League cricket competition is so keen to ride on the popularity of the Tour de France that it announces a positive dope test of its own; Pakistan fast bowler Mohammad Asif is the man found out.

Tuesday 15 July
Summer is here and the PM is off to Southwold for his family hols. English Heritage states that a new visitor centre at Stonehenge will be open in time for the 2012 Olympics; a public consultation is being launched. Research by the Work Foundation finds that Britain’s historic coastal towns are missing out on advances in the ‘knowledge economy’. Hamburg HSV, one of German football’s finest, has opened its own cemetery for the most loyal of fans. The National Audit Office warns that development of the Greenwich Dome site could stall post-2012 if the property slump continues. Decathlete Dean Macey announces his retirement after a decade of injury and disappointment. Richard Caborn confesses that he “dropped a clanger” in not making sure that the Tote was sold to a racing trust during his time as minister for sport.

Wednesday 16 July
Bournemouth unveils plans for a £3m artificial reef off Boscombe beach that will bring surfers flocking to their bit of the coast; the business plan predicts a £3m annual boost to the economy and the creation of ninety jobs. Nicolas Sarkozy lays the foundation stone of a new wing at the Louvre dedicated to Islamic art. Cricket authorities planning the creation of an English Premier League for the Twenty20 competition are discussing the possibility of a draft in the style of American sport. On the eve of the Open at Royal Birkdale the numerous governing bodies that claim involvement in golf across the UK announce a campaign to have golf included in the Olympics. A report from the Racegoers Club says that regular racegoers attending the horseracing meetings around the country are increasingly put off by rowdy and drunken behaviour on the course.

Thursday 17 July
The Audit Commission warns that local authorities are not doing enough to keep the ageing population engaged, enthused and active. A third stage win for Mark Cavendish and a unique achievement for a Brit. Not unique is a high-profile rider testing positive; this time it’s Riccardo Ricco, an Italian rider who has been targeted by anti-doping authorities suspicious about his intake. John Lennon is to be the subject of a biopic. More work for our Olympic Price Watch correspondent as the Nuclear Decommissioning Authority says that the cost of cleaning up Britain’s nuclear power plants should be estimated at £83bn rather than the previously accepted figure of £73bn. Meanwhile, travel agents report less than brisk business for Olympic travel packages, blaming security restrictions on travel in Beijing and high ticket prices. However, outdoor retailer Blacks reports booming sales in tents and camping equipment. Montell Douglas breaks the British women’s 100m record in 11.05, a record set by Cathy Cook twenty-seven years ago.

Friday 18 July
Masts and tars gather in Liverpool for the 2008 Tall Ships race. Sir Nicholas Serota admits that the work at Tate Modern to expand the display space by 60% may not be complete by London 2012. Dwain Chambers application for an injunction against the British Olympic Association’s rules on drugs bans is not upheld and he abandons hopes of running in the Olympics. So too does Oscar Pistorious – aka the Blade Runner – who has failed to make the qualifying time for Beijing. The first beavers born in Britain for five hundred years are currently safe and well in Gloucestershire. French scientists find that loud music in pubs and bars increases the rate of consumption among drinkers. Blimey: Mark Cavendish can’t stop winning; that’s four and it seems to be getting easier for the justifiably mouthy Manxman.

Saturday 19 July
Nick Park, creator of Wallace and Gromit, is to serve as guest editor of the seventieth anniversary issue of the Beano. Lord Coe suggests that Sir Alex Ferguson might like to take charge of a British Olympic football team in the London Olympic competition. Meanwhile, Trevor Brooking says that England are unlikely to get past the quarter-finals at the next world cup.

Sunday 20 July
Curators at the Reina Sofia museum in Madrid are carrying out a close study of Picasso’s Guernica, fearful that its journeys around the world have taken their toll. The Italian RFU announces its intention to bid for the 2015 world cup. Padraig Harrington defends his Open title at Royal Birkdale. A summer friendly between West Ham and Columbus Crew in Ohio sees the introduction of crowd violence to the American game.

Monday 21 July
Olympic Price Watch: the cost of top nineteen equipment projects within the Ministry of Defence are £28bn but this is betting without the Eurofigther, the costs of which are not published for reasons of commercial sensitivity. The Dark Knight, the latest Batman film, opens in London after record box office in its opening weekend in the States. Rotherham PCT is sending children to the Carnegie weight-loss camp as part of a radical attempt to combat obesity. Not a million miles away is Frankie Gavin, GB’s Olympic boxing hope, who is struggling to make the weight for the lightweight competition in Beijing. The BBC Trust ends all commercial sponsorship of BBC events following complaints from commercial television rivals; events such as Sports Personality of the Year and Proms in the Park will lose their sponsors. Professional tennis players Frantisek Cermak and Michal Mertinak are banned for ten and two weeks respectively for betting on tennis matches. CLM, the consultancy hired by the Olympic Delivery Authority for London 2012, was paid £87.6m in fees despite costs for some venues rising by almost three times the original estimates. Sports minister Gerry Sutcliffe announces that the Tote will be sold this autumn.

Tuesday 22 July
The Royal Opera House announces that tickets for the opening night for Don Giovanni on 8 September will be offered exclusively to Sun readers. The government warns the drinks industry not to flout the voluntary code on the promotion and sale of alcohol. Meanwhile a study shows a 9% drop in the number of pints sold since the smoking ban in England last summer, including a 14% drop in sales of premium strength lager. Linford Christies suggests that Dwain Chambers should be rehabilitated and used as ambassador for athletics.

Wednesday 23 July
JK Rowling heads the Forbes’ list of the world’s richest celebrities (£150m) and Madame Tussaud’s unveils the effigy of Amy Winehouse in London. China is to provide ‘protest pens’ for demonstrators at the Beijing Games, according to a Chinese official, and the British Foreign Office warns protesters that they face arrest and detention in Beijing. Health secretary Alan Johnson calls for a national movement to combat obesity and suggests that telling fat people that their condition is all their own fault is not very helpful. Olympic Price Watch goes nuclear: the Department for Business concedes that they have found £400m from “other budgets” to mitigate the “inherent risks” associated with the funding for the Nuclear Decommissioning Authority.

Thursday 24 July
The Commons public accounts committee finds that hopes of persuading business to contribute £100m to the athletes’ training fund for London 2012 are foundering in the face of the famous credit crunch. British Waterways warns that the long-term funding for the nation’s canals needs to be sorted out. The Arts Council’s annual report shows that former chief exec Peter Hewitt left with a £128,000 payment in addition to his £149,000 salary and pension contribution of £27,000. Meanwhile, David Cameron has his bike stolen in Notting Hill while shopping for salad. British Cycling confirms that Sky TV is to be its principal sponsor up to London 2012. The IOC confirms that five Iraqi athletes will not be able to take part in Beijing as a result of the Iraqi Olympic committee being suspended on the grounds of “political interference”; the Iraqi government had disbanded the local Olympic committee on the grounds of “blatant corruption”.

Friday 25 July
Olympic Price Watch goes nuclear twice in a week when the Guardian reports that the UK government is to spend £3bn on replacing its nuclear arsenal. Manchester United confirm that they are playing two games in Africa this weekend for the money, rumoured to be about £1.5m a game. Having played 47 games in three years for Newcastle, Michael Owen thinks that he deserves an increase on his £105,000 a week salary; or else he’ll be off.

Saturday 26 July
Eight of Ronnie Kray’s paintings – all landscapes – sell for £16,550 at auction. Usain Bolt breaks the UK 200m all-comers’ record at Crystal Palace. Walking for 45 minutes can help control diabetes, according to a Newcastle University study. New fountains are planned for Trafalgar Square in the run-up to 2012, including energy-efficient coloured lighting and occasional eighty-foot jets.

Sunday 27 July
Former Olympic hurdler Peter Hildreth has been asked to stop running up the down escalators in his local department store in Farnham, Surrey; he was doing it to show his friends he was still fit, said the 80-year-old. The Sir John Soane Museum is to undergo a restoration following a £6.3m fund-raising campaign. Residents of St Tropez in the south of France are campaigning against the endless helicopter traffic ferrying the wealthy to the resort over the summer. Carlos Sastre wins the Tour.

Monday 28 July
The Grand Pier at Weston-super-Mare goes up in flames. A ceramic Fernandez sculpture nine feet in height is toppled and smashed by a visitor to the Royal Academy. Damien Hirst announces he is to sell his latest batch of work direct at auction at Sotheby’s in September rather than via dealers. Sir Richard Branson unveils the plane that he reckons will take tourists into space. With air quality still not good enough, Beijing is planning to close all building sites and factories in the vicinity for the duration of the Games. Joey Barton is released from prison to return to his £65,000-a-week job in Newcastle.

Tuesday 29 July
The head of the BBC Chinese service, Lorna Ball, has had her invitation to the opening ceremony of the Olympic Games withdrawn. Ricky Hatton splits from trainer Billy Graham with each offering a different reason for the situation.

Wednesday 30 July
Ofcom fines the BBC £400,000 for unfair phone-ins. New X-ray techniques have revealed the clear image of a Van Gogh portrait that had been overpainted by the artist. A report by Lady McIntosh finds that the Arts Council’s last funding round was so badly handled that the council was severely damaged as a result. Business secretary John Hutton says that tips in restaurants must not be counted towards the minimum wages of staff; new regulations are expected after a consultation later this year. Italian cyclist Ricardo Ricco has now admitted taking EPO following his positive test. “In theory all the tests should have been positive, therefore the method needs to be checked,” he says.

Thursday 31 July
Olympic Price Watch with gas: Centrica, parent company of British Gas, announces profits of £992m in the first six months of 2008; that the announcement came 24 hours after it announced price increases of 35% for consumers only adds to the joy. Almost 60,000 primary and secondary pupils missed classes without permission during the spring term. Andy Parkinson, acting head of anti-doping at UK Sport, reveals he’s worried by British athletes being tempted to dope in the run-up to 2012. The FA is thought likely to impose a fifteen-match ban on one Mr J Barton of Newcastle.